March 2012
73 posts
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Laywer's Take on DELETE YR PINTEREST →
adriennes:
megwhat:
“You agree to defend, indemnify, and hold Cold Brew Labs, its officers, directors, employees and agents, harmless from and against any claims, liabilities, damages, losses, and expenses, including, without limitation, reasonable legal and accounting fees, arising out of or in any way connected with (i) your access to or use of the Site, Application, Services or Site...
February 2012
71 posts
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These Things I Know To Be True
Getting one’s period for the first time is to becoming a woman as buying your first pair of Naturalizer shoes is to becoming an old lady.
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Changes Planned for Prospect Park Loop -... →
thedept:
As someone who’s on the cusp of moving to what basically amounts to the entranceway of Prospect Park and plans to bike in there a fair amount, I say yes to this.
From the article: “Under the proposal, the center lane, which is now used by motorists during morning and evening rush hours and by bicyclists at other times, would be for bicycles all day. (Car traffic is allowed from...
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Modern Life Reality
My experience is that if you spill coffee on your chest area, a guy isn’t going to let you know because it means he has to acknowledge his eyes went there—however briefly or innocently.
On a related note, I wish I had a tide pen.
UPDATE: Also found coffee on stomach. I officially have a drinking problem.
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The Name of My New All Lady Bowling Team...
Downtown Alley.
God damn I have some awesome friends! Looking forward to this starting so very much.
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The Textpert: Romance Isn't Dead, Merely Comatose... →
My Original Post:
Me: Hey [Guy I Used to See], I just found your earring in my room. You must have lost it here a month ago. I can drop it by your sister’s apartment. Is it expensive?
Dude: Lol. That’s awesome. I don’t know what to do. We should bang again and I’ll pick it up. I was just about to ask u how [my writing project] is going.
….
The Textpert’s Take:
I want to...
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Overheard just now in a Williamsburg bank
Dude: You’re out of hundreds?! How is that even possible?
Mark this day on your calendars, folks. Williamsburg is officially gentrified.
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Romance Isn't Dead, Merely Comatose On Life...
Last Night, Via Text
Me: Hey [Guy I Used to See], I just found your earring in my room. You must have lost it here a month ago. I can drop it by your sister’s apartment. Is it expensive?
Dude: Lol. That’s awesome. I don’t know what to do. We should bang again and I’ll pick it up. I was just about to ask u how [my writing project] is going.
Me: I’m open to...
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Accomplishment of the Day
eggsactly reblogged your photo: I love you, frittata. Now get in my stomach!
I love that there’s a blog out there that collects images of egg dishes. If there was a frittata fan club, I would totally join!
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Tumblr Staff: A New Policy Against Self-Harm Blogs →
staff:
Our Content Policy has not, until now, prohibited blogs that actively promote self-harm. These typically take the form of blogs that glorify or promote anorexia, bulimia, and other eating disorders; self-mutilation; or suicide. These are messages and points of view that we strongly oppose, and don’t want to be hosting.
Totally overdue and very, very welcome policy announcement from...
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Tonight
I gave a guy my number, and then he gave my female friend a concussion. I couldn’t make this stuff up.
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The Best Thing I Have Done Today
Was write this sentence:
“The G train stop at Metropolitan Ave is quite possibly the least romantic place on Earth other than the bowels of a humpback whale.”
This was in a date recap to my ladyfriends. I burden them with my feelings on the regular.
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This Is Why I Am Single: I Need a Mint Edition
I have a date tonight, and so far today I have eaten:
White Bean and Garlic Dip with veggies
Garlic Pita Chips
Lentil Dal
Yogurt with Grape Nuts on top
Mucho coffee
I also referred to myself in the third person in a text message.
I’m the worst.
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Happy Would-Have-Been 50th Birthday, David Foster...
I didn’t grow up in a literary household. Our solitary bookcase was filled by an Encyclopedia collection (This was, of course, the pre-internet 1980s.), back issues of National Geographic and children’s books. Despite this—and it’s sometimes difficult to establish causation in these instances—I either grew up loving to read because I was lonely or I was lonely...
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An Open Letter to India
Dear India (and also Bangladesh and Pakistan because I’m taking the long view),
Thank you for mastering vegetarian cuisine. Not only are Indian vegetarian options perfectly spiced and delicious, but they are also some of the cheapest ways to get protein around. Moreover—and for someone who lives alone this is very important—these dishes last a while. Meat dishes go off in a...
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Re: Thomson Reuter's Private Wine Stash
allisonfoley replied to your photo: Hey law students, just wanted you to know your…
Forget law students! My co subscribes to a ton of their programs and one of those programs is a major headache for me right now, cause its always broken. Id like to take my repayment in the form of that wine!
Excellent point! Hey, everyone, let’s go down to the Capital Grille on Wall Street and storm...
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My List of Embarrassing Moments
I was just reading this article where the author lists a bunch of embarrassing events in the hopes that doing so will ‘set her free.’ As someone who obsesses endlessly about her failings, this appeals to me deeply. Presented below is an incomplete list of embarrassing things I did or happened to me up through high school. I’m not over any of them.
When I was 5 I wore a skunk...
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First World Problems
I can’t keep all the names in Game of Thrones straight.
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Advice from My Grandma
Advice I recently received from my Grandmother after I sent her this picture of my cat in a flower pot:
Don’t let your cat hide in your “neighbor’s” garbage can. She’ll probably put arsenic in it….Try and keep the cats inside more so your neighbor doesn’t throw you or them off the roof.
She must think I live next door to psychopaths!! To be fair to...
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An Open Letter to the Broads on Facebook Posting...
Ladies-
Thanks!
Let me explain. Having flowers delivered to one’s office on Valentine’s Day means a couple things.
Your partner understands that your relationship is a performance piece. What’s the use of loving someone if you can’t do it in front of other people? We all know the sound of one hand clapping. It’s depressing, soul-crushing silence....
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UPDATE: Not even humble lawyer brag
infinitezest:
I’m 1/3rd of the way into the direct examination of an expert—as a 4th year attorney. Big opportunity for me. And unusual in NY law practice.
Anyway, the guy opposing me is a partner at a law firm, and so far I am coming off far, far better.
In short, suck it dude.
UPDATE!
1) I am a little embarrassed I posted something so braggy above. Not really my style. I’m tempted to...
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Not even humble lawyer brag
I’m 1/3rd of the way into the direct examination of an expert—as a 4th year attorney. Big opportunity for me. And unusual.
Anyway, the guy opposing me is a partner at a law firm, and so far I am coming off far, far better.
In short, suck it dude.
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deep thoughts
allisonfoley:
umcanyounot:
would you trade getting mildly hit by a car (just a few bumps and bruises - nothing serious - but still traumatic) if, in turn, you got a paid week off of work?
This means you need to look for a new job, stat. I contemplated getting into a minor accident nearly every day of my post-college- career-type job.
Preach. This was not an unfamiliar fantasy while I was...
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Life Lessons
If you eat roasted sunflower seeds in bed, when you wake up the next morning it will look like you fucked a bird feeder.
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Exciting morning over here!
My cat just lit his tail on fire and didn’t seem to notice even after I LEAPED up to put it out.
I think humanity can rest easy because cats aren’t poised to take over the world any time soon.
